My Story





"For all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God".
 Romans 3:23 

l battled a lot and still am battling about this blog. How far should l take it or how transparent should l be. Today is the day l breakout of my Cycle and live up to what l have been called to do. It is not going to be a good story sugar quoted with the right words but as raw and transparent as l can be; no more running.

l say no more running because l feel like Jonah right now, was sent to spread the love of God through my life but instead took a hike and decided to do my own thing. Or some would relate better with Prodigal Son, l surely felt that l needed my share and go figure out life and then just hope God will bless it. 

Well, the past couple of weeks l have done that a lot, take life into my own hands and just hope God would bless it. There is someone l am in love with, l met him a couple years ago and yes it has been a bumpy ride. l have hurt him too many times now and l have no intention of doing any of that but just love him. To be honest it is really complicated and l have made it that way. l have always have had this list of an ideal guy that l want to be with especially growing up in a christian home and yet alone being a Pastors kid. You know keep mum and dad happy and let the rest of the congregation applaud you. Such a heavy burden to carry.

In the past few years l have disappointed myself and hurt the love of my life all to keep everyone else happy. l have fallen, l have sinned and l have taken matters into my own hands. l have run away from what God is calling me to do. We all want to be happy and society especially the church expects that at my age l am settling down and have someone to do life with (marriage). l have come to a realization that during the season l am in, "God is calling me to be Single". l have run away and tried to chase the one for me and l have ended up hurting him. 

l choose to chase after the man who has had my heart and my life plans in the palm of His hand. l choose to come back to the Heart of Worship. l do not know how long this season will be but l am rest assured that it is worth every second spent with Him than a thousand elsewhere. 

"To the one l love" 

l wonder who you are sometimes,
Are you the Knight in the Shiny Armour?
The one that waits patiently for prey?
Others say, you are on your knees searching deep in the Father's heart.

Is it true, nature stands still when you pass
melting the leaves by your worth?
Did your mother name you Samson just at mere glance at you,
coming from the power you exuded from your first cry?
How your friends praise you- 
Not because you are strong but a Mighty Warrior of Valor you are.
They run to you with all their troubles
For from you flows words of life and peace.

Peace, Peace l wait to experience when l finally meet you.
l find myself at ease from thoughts that one day you shall find me.
l have tried to prepare but l fail.
Preparation was not spoken over me.
l come with experience wrapped up in humility and grace knowing He who will bring us together will see us through.

Say a little pray for the one l love
For soon l shall be with the one l love.

l am sorry to all that l have dragged along as l was Jonah running from my call or the Prodigal Son that l thought l was; ready to have my fair share of love and life. l have gone back to be clothed by the beautiful robe ever and sit at His feet and there You shall find me.

l pray that you also decide to answer to the call. Rest assured He has chased me down and found me, He will find you too. Do not argue or resist. Let go and let God❤

The love l write about is from my experience the journey l am on. It is not easy, l have fallen and will fall but l choose to cut the Cycle right here. 
#no more pressure from family
#no more pressure from friends
#no more pressure from society and church
l choose to seek the Lord and serve Him.
As for me and my house l will serve the Lord.

Diary of a love story.




Comments

  1. A relationship with God is not easy but I applaude how someone who works on it and that trust will raise someone's faith.

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